Aikavols, the Country of Thousand Beloved Surprises

I simply tend to ramble. I cannot do anything about that. This article does not give a try to look as an example of creativity. (Crummy) Fiction.

I came to the country of Aikavols three weeks ago. An uninitiated might object that three weeks create too small space for knowing the mentality of whole nation but I am such an experienced anthropologist that I can objectively judge level of mental and social development of any native group right away. So or so, I found Aikavolsans to be very interesting subject of observation. According to their unique and many times strange attributes of behavior I made a detailed work depicting their nature, habits, and traditions. This essay is my effort to sketch life in one of the Aikavolsan cities. I am convinced that the reader interested in this exotic issue will also get to my book called Aikavols, the Country of Thousand Beloved Surprises.

Bar Tislava is the capital of Aikavols. The people living in Bar Tislava have very special way of living. I suspect that most of the citizens have secretly had a chip implanted into their brain which makes them abnormally hurried and what is more interesting, thanks for the implant, their faces lost any sign of emotions and they look perfectly grave at any possible occasion. Note, that this chip works especially at bus stops, train stations, banks and hospitals.

One habit that made me question about inventiveness of other nations is Bar Tislavakers’ unique liking in biological heat- without reference to the winter or summer season. I am sure that this penchant has roots in age-long tradition. Also today it is being passed on younger generations and thus I am convinced that it will not die out. The habit of sticking one’s body to the neighbor’s as close as possible usually takes place in cars of mass transportation, pop music concerts, commercial club Doppler, and in stores during seasonal sales. To a stranger this sticking habit in combination with the grave faces appears to be very exciting and fascinating experience that makes one taste the real human heat.

Such extraordinary people and habits create conditions for some unusual employments. Especially remarkable are some individuals that invented a creative way of private enterprise. They are usually referred to as Quick runners or Harvesters. The places of their occupation are mostly the Sticking-body crowds. Adapting flexibility and speed of cheetah they dodge among the crowded people and search their pockets for small unnecessary items such as purses, watches and personal diaries. Sometimes they clear away also a poodle or chihuahua.

Bar Tislava is a city of magic. Not only me but also many others came to know this. Especially during Friday nights the downtown is living with young partying men from En Gland. However, Bar Tislavans usually dislike them for their noisy behavior that is in discrepancy with the implanted chips and grave faces.

This and much more an outsider will experience in Bar Tislava. However, for a deeper and more complete experience, one has to travel through the whole Aikavols and visit such attractive places as Lunik 9, Zilina, Pribylina, and Zahorie (similarly as I did), or seek my new and exciting book.